Why Do I Feel Like This? – Culture Shock
When you travel to a new country, or move to another part of your state or district, did you have any feelings of sadness, depression, loneliness, anxiety? Have you ever had that feeling that nobody understood your background? Did you have a hard time adjusting to your new surroundings, the new culture, the mannerisms of people?
I’m here to tell you that you’re not alone. You may have experienced something known as culture shock.
Culture shock, as defined by Dictionary.com, is “a state of bewilderment and distress experienced by an individual who is suddenly exposed to a new, strange, or foreign social and culture environment”.

When you are exposed to new environments, especially when you’re traveling and have to stay for longer periods of time, it is not uncommon to experience a sense of anxiety, distress, loneliness, or bewilderment. Observing and processing languages, cultures, mannerisms, environments, even food that are different from what you’ve known your entire life is a huge transition to go through!
I know when I studied abroad in London, I was just amazed at the fact that I even made it there because it seemed like for years I couldn’t travel to London. I was in love with London, the wonderful accents of its people, and seeing the normal tourist attractions for the first couple of weeks!
However, that soon cam spiraling down. My friend experienced this culture shock first. I didn’t think much of it because I wasn’t experiencing the same feelings as her. At the time, I was so happy that my dream had finally come true, I was too elated to experience culture shock.

Three weeks after my arrival, that’s when culture shock hit me. That initial craze, excitement had gone, and I realized that this new country was now my home for the next 3 months. It was only when I started to interact with the locals and saw how they engaged with me, especially being American, that I started to feel very upset and alone.
I’m a New Yorker, and I know we’re known for not being the nicest people in the world and tend to just keep to ourselves and go on about our day. But being an American who likes to make small talk, smile, be open with others, and trying to do that with a person in London, didn’t go over too well. In my eyes at the time, it seemed like they were somewhat like New Yorkers in the sense that they didn’t have time or want to talk with others, but it still felt different because I wasn’t in New York.
Nobody really smiled at me, tried to be nice and ask how I was doing, or tried to be helpful when I needed it. If someone walked passed me and I said “good morning, how are you?”, they would just stare at me as if I was crazy. My friend and I would sit in a restaurant and wait forever for a waiter to come over, and when they did, it wasn’t the typical “American service” we were used to. Smiling, making small talk, being openly emotional, those are more American mannerisms and customs. I knew the culture, mannerisms, and etiquette was different in London but I just wasn’t prepared for just how different it was.
(I KNOW THIS DOESN’T DEFINE ALL PEOPLE IN LONDON AND I KNOW THE CULTURE IS DIFFERENT FROM AMERICA. I JUST PUT SOME OF THE SCENARIOS I ENCOUNTERED. MY PERSONAL EXPERIENCES DO NOT DEFINE EVERYONE IN LONDON AS I ALSO MET SOME SWEET PEOPLE WHILE OVER THERE)

That was just the people. I didn’t even get into the food, clothing, weather, housing, the vocabulary, and every other detail that was just shocking to me in London! It was all such a shock to my system. You could spend years dreaming about, learning, and understanding the culture of another place (just as I did). But when you’re physically in that location, and although you know that things are different, you can’t help but to notice the differences and start to feel so many things at once.
Thankfully, I met some amazing friends in London and they were one of the many ways I managed to stay sane and connected to my American roots while getting over my shock. It took me about a month to get over my culture shock, but once I did everything else fell into place.
It’s important to of course do your research so you’re better prepared for the experiences you may encounter, but it’ll never truly prepare you until you’re there in person. It’s also important to be aware of your own thoughts and feelings, and to find what it is that will help you get over your culture shock. I know it’s a lot easier said than done, but if you let your emotions and thoughts consume you (like it did for my friend) it’ll ruin your travel experience.
It’s ok and normal to experience culture shock. We’ve all experience it at some point in our lives. Whether you moved to a new town, state, or country, it is hard processing and adapting to new social and cultural environments. But also remember why you’re traveling, and try not to get bogged down! You won’t regret it!
No everyone in London/England is like that, although many are reserved. If you ever come back, I’d love to sit and chat with you.
For the most part they are. I guess the few that were open with me only did that because they got excited when I told them I was from New York? (apparently they sensed my accent and asked where I was from) But either way I still love London and it’s people. Hopefully we can travel next year and we can meet up!
That would be awesome. I’m sorry you found all the rude people when you we here before
It’s all good. I got used to it after a while
Amazing post! I loved reading this! It’s a shame about the rude people.
Thank you. You just get used to them after a while
I felt this on another level being black at a pwi & being so far away from home! It’s a whole different vibe here!
It’s crazy!
I have lived in many different places and gone through this several times; in fact I’m going through it right now, so it was good to read this! It normally takes me about three months to adapt to my new surroundings, and that’s speaking from the experience of five major moves in my lifetime! I think London was the hardest actually even though I’m from the UK: I’m from the North and London is very different!
Thank you for the comment. I hope your shock isn’t too rough for you! I’m glad to see and hear how others go through the same thing but adapt in different ways. London is a very different place indeed
Interesting post! I can only image how difficult it can be to be in a new place for three months trying your best to fit in and immerse yourself in the culture but not immediately feeling welcomed. Glad you were able to find a group of people to help you enjoy your experience. And hoped your friend was able to shake her culture shock blues and take advantage of the opportunity.
Thank you! It’s always difficult but it’s also eye opening and humbling to one’s self. She did get over the shock but for the rest of her time there she was very homesick and missed her family in the states
Hi Jojo, Aneka sliding over from Twitter! So, I loved this piece because it rang truth for me. I experienced this when I took a short trip (still in Jamaica) to Montego Bay. The culture over there is so much different from the main, Kingston. It took me a while to accustom to people even in my own country! I realized each parish had it’s own routines and if you didn’t jump in and grab, you would be washed away. Thanks for sharing!
Thank you, I’m glad to hear you connected with the post! It’s always so hard navigating a new place and its culture. And yass, i’m half Jamaican (my dad is from Portmore), I’d love to go back to Montego Bay
That is awesome! I was worried about posting in patois if anyone didn’t understand 🤗
I don’t think anyone else would but I’d understand you 😊👍🏾🇯🇲
I can completely relate to this, I moved to Hong Kong for a year, which is an incredible international city, and it was a bit of a shock getting used to how things worked. I still got nervous using the crowded MTR even by the end of that time!
I’m glad to hear you did have some positive experiences of London amongst the culture shock 🙂
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https://philippaclaire.com/2020/07/07/gratitude-journal-prompts-inject-some-positivity-into-your-life/
Thank you, I’m glad to hear about your experiences as well!
I completely get what your saying, I understand how people can be! A great post! Thank you for sharing!
Amber – https://theunpredictedpage.com
I have visited many places around the world and the first thing I notice is the politeness of the locals. I am sorry to hear you had such experience with England. I went through something similar in Germany but one thing I learned is to not allow it to ruin my overall experience. I hope you get better interactions in the future. Thank you for sharing.
Darina from daramiblog
Thank you, I’m glad to hear you’ve had good experiences!
Being from the east coast of the US originally myself, I have interacted with many lovely people from across the pond. But, like anywhere else, you’re bound to run into a few bad apples. Heck, it’s funny to think when I was little, we visited New Brunswick, and it was actually pretty amazing to me just how different it was culturally to right across the border in Maine.
It was a pleasant experience, but enough to make me say “Canada is like a whole different country!” 😀 Obviously, yes, it is, but yes, culture shock is very real, even when you go from one part of the US to another, as I did moving to Colorado.
Oh yes, there are some lovely people in London. You learn to love it but it’s just like “whoa!” at first
My biggest issue is leaving California I don’t get enough sun.
I can imagine not getting that beautiful sun!
Interesting post to read! I can’t imagine how you must have felt and that there were rude people didn’t help either. I’ve always lived in England and have never been in another country long enough to experience this. I’m glad you had friends who were able to help and that you were able to enjoy London once everything had settled 🙂
Thank you! London is still my favorite city despite my experiences
Good read! I’ve only left the country once to go to Mexico and I know I experienced culture shock instantly crossing the border. It’s a whole different story when you’re going to live there short term!
Thank you. It definitely is a different story lol
I studied in London and I wish Londoners were more open and chatty. I was born in Malaysia and moved to England at the age of ten, so I 100% know what you mean about culture shock. My peers at school suddenly sounded, looked and behaved completely differently, and it wasn’t always easy to find my footing in a new environment. Having a good support network to help you settle is everything 🙂
Thank you for sharing your experience as well! It’s always overwhelming but with time, and a good support system, it will become easier to adjust
Culture shock is definitely quite an experience. Nowadays before I go somewhere else, I try to do some research, mostly via blogs, as well as remind myself to not have much expectations as it’ll always be different than what I’m used to. Hope your experience will be a better one next time you’re in London. x
Exactly! I think it will be now that I’m more prepared
I’ve made major moves in my adult life. You are absolutely correct that it is a shock to the system.
It’s part of the adjustment process
I guess I’m lucky. I’ve moved a couple of times away from my home town and despite experiencing culture shock, I can say I’ve always been helped through by locals.
That’s great to hear!
Thanks for sharing- It was nice to get a perspective of the anxiety that can potentially come with travelling. The fact you were so happy you hadn’t yet recognised the culture shock-
I’m so sorry you had to experience that in London- you should’ve definitely gone to Bath- we love Americans and have always gone out of our way to give them good service in hospitality!!
Yeah, it was like that honeymoon phase where you’re just so happy with everything and it takes awhile for reality to kick in lol.
But I enjoyed it! and thank you, I’d love to go to Bath ❤️
As a Londoner, this was a very insightful post to read! I’ll actually be visiting New York for the first time in October so it would be great to do a response post with my experience in NYC!!
Roni🖤
http://www.myelevatedexistence.com
Thank you, and that’s awesome!! I hope you enjoy it in New York 😊 If you have questions about New York as well just let me know and I’ll do my best to help 😊
I totally get this feeling! I went travelling for a year and stayed in a few countries for long periods of time and definitely felt the culture shock. I think I felt this the most when I travelled to India. Honestly felt so aone and in a completely different culture where I felt I really wasn’t understood at all. Great post!
Thank you for sharing your experience! I you were able to overcome your shock without much stress ❤️
Very sorry to hear about the rude people, it’s not what you want and it doesn’t make things easy!
It’s alright. It was quite the adjustment which ended with a great experience!
It’s actually difficult to fit in a new surrounding! I’ve been through this dilemma a lot and can feel exactly what you want to convey. I have toured many places and got varied notions!! That’s a nice read actually. Thanks for sharing☺
Thank you, I loved hearing your take on it as well!
Welcome☺
Thanks for sharing your experience. Great post 💛
Thank you!
Good ‘ol culture shock! This book by Kate Fox was recommended to me when I moved to the UK:
https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/288448.Watching_the_English
Learning to navigate a new culture & esp the way people communicate differently really does take time & patience, doesn’t it!? Happy to hear you left London loving it nonetheless
Thank you! I appreciate it!
I’m about to go through the same thing with an upcoming move, even within my own country. I remember when I first visited and just the weather, and the people were so completely different to my home state, I found it super difficult to adapt. I think I’ve got a bit of a better idea and hopefully won’t be so EEK this time haha
It’s nice (but also not nice) to hear the experiences of others around the world. Thank you for your write up x
Claire | Short Girl Walking
Thank you for sharing your experience as well, I hope all goes well with your move!
England and London are certainly different from the U.S. I’ve been to England a bunch of times and love it. It was interesting to read your comments and thoughts on the culture there.
Thank you!
I can totally relate. I had to relocate to a from south of India to the west of India a couple of years before. Trust me, I am yet to recover from the culture shock.
Thank you for sharing your experience with me. I hope it gets better from here!
I totally relate!!! I lived in Norway for almost one year and the culture was so different from mine!!! I left Italy in winter, the weather was good, when I arrived in Norway there was a snow storm….it’s not just the weather, everything, as you said, it was a culture shock
Wow, thank you for sharing your experience with me! I hope you were able to adjust in time
Having leave in three different continents I have experienced my fair share of culture shock. Thanks for sharing your experience. I mean I went from people asking me what oils I used for my hair to people trying to touch it without permission then them asking if my hair sheds. I have so many stories it is just ridiculous. Coming from Africa where I have never experience racism, moving to the west, the shock came from our ingrained racism is in the culture.
Thank you for sharing your experiences as well! I hated it when I was younger and people wanted to touch my hair (I’m mixed so my hair is puffy and curly).
I really don’t understand why people feel the need to touch, I can understand the fascination, but they can sometimes be so impolite
Me too, we’re not dogs and you can’t touch our hair whenever you want. 😩
exactly
I understand this experience (on a smaller level). I visited France for 2 weeks and was treated very differently than the locals by waiters and such. Like you said, it’s not that all people from a country are rude but many seem to dislike Americans. Great post!
Thank you for sharing your experience as well! When I went to Paris most of them didn’t seem to like us either.
I have lived abroad multiple times, and while I had good & bad moments like anywhere, I didn’t really run into what you would consider culture shock. At least I didn’t feel that way in a negative sense; my culture shock was more of a happy awe & excitement for all of the changes.
I do, however, always experience reverse culture shock. I find it hard adjusting back to life in America after living overseas. I often catch myself wishing I was back.
That’s good to hear how you had an more happy experience with culture shock!
And I agree, it took some time for me to adjust when I got back to New York as well
Yeah, I like America, but I do miss the way things were abroad.
I miss them too! I’m hoping next year we’ll be able to travel abroad again 🤞🏾
Fingers crossed!